My Morning Glory Wednesday, Jun 29 2011 


I took a break from writing yesterday because I have something going on with my hands. It was a FIRE going on yesterday and water and ice wasn’t going to help. Remember that 80’s Hair Band, The Cult? They sang that song Fire Woman. In my mind, I have a little cult following of my own that checks out what I have to say on the blog, so I’ll charge ahead while I hum that God-awful-yet-super-catchy-flashback song in my head. I may have already listened to it on Youtube this morning too. Call me FIRE WOMAN now, OK?

These wrist guards seem to be helping the pain but not my self-esteem. They are for old people I think, yet the cute girl on the front of the box looks happy. And young. And she has nice skin. So I’m going to ignore the mirror sitting next to me on my vanity/writing desk and pretend that I look like THAT girl without frizzy hair and reading glasses in all my morning glory.

I think it’s ironic that my “birthday flower” is supposed to be a Morning Glory. Check this out that I found on www.babiesonline.com when I Googled the flower:

As its name insinuates, the Morning Glory is a flower that blooms in the morning hours. However, by the time the sun has fallen, the flower has died. Each morning will give birth to a brand new flower on the plant. Because they bloom in the morning, they are often pollinated by hummingbirds, bees, butterflies and other daytime birds and insects.

Many species of Morning Glory have seeds that contain LSA which is a drug that is up to 10% as potent as LSD. To discourage the growing of Morning Glory specifically for drugs, some cultivators are treating the seeds before they sell them with a chemical that can not be washed off and will cause vomiting and sickness if ingested.

In Japan the Morning Glory is known as asagao, asa “morning” and kao “face”. In China it has been used for medicinal purposes as a powerful laxative. During the Edo Period it because a popular decorative flower. It is often used next to walls as it will grow as a vine, blocking out some of the heat and lowering air conditioning bills in the summer.

Fun and interesting fact: By soaking the flowers from the Morning Glory in water for a couple of weeks you can create a mildly alcoholic wine with a good flavor and mild psychedelic effect. You can add herbs or honey to this to enhance the flavor.

OK, look. That description there talks about this beautiful flower and its “morning face.” It dies at night and you can use it to make wine. Total OPPOSITE of me. I was born three weeks early, so I’m not alot like my zodiac sign either, but I in fact come to LIFE at night sometimes with the HELP of wine. I am flat ugly in the morning too, so my face is not beautiful when I rise with the sun/son. My kids have asked me when I’ve had to go to school for meetings and such to NOT look how I look in the morning for drop off. Whatever. I threatened once to walk them to class HAND IN HAND smiling if they didn’t get things into gear and get out the door in time. The seeds of that plant can be CULTivated to make some sort of LSD type drug though. Maybe I AM like that flower and my kids are like my seeds and that explains why people think WE are on drugs occasionally. And what about that “laxative” part?? People have indeed told me that they “lose their $!!+” sometimes when I get going on something. Hmmmm…

So I did a little more research and here’s what Wikipedia said:

Most morning glory flowers perk up and harden during the early morning and are often fully erect, thus their name. The flowers usually start to fade a couple of hours before the “petals” start showing visible curling. They prefer full exposure throughout the day and mesic soils. Some morning glories, such as Ipomoea muricata, are night blooming flowers.

Get past that “erect” stuff and quit giggling because looky there! There is ACTUALLY a type of morning glory that blooms and comes to life at night just like me! Not all of the pretty flowers are the same. There are different varieties and mine is just not as common. Of course it’s not! I wear a set of HOT little reading glasses when I read/write because they are tiger-striped and make me look younger than bifocals which I actually think I need now, but I may just bedazzle these little wrist guards to guard against the aging effects I’m facing now. Brace yourselves people at The WalMarts! I’m coming out in all my glory! (more…)

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The Dynasty Friday, Jun 17 2011 


So this is what writers do, right? WRITE.

A new chapter in my life has started. I bet “real” writers have a desk instead of a make-up vanity which is what I use now to write. It works for me though, and I can’t complain. I moved into a little apartment with the kids and left behind quite a bit. What is here is CHERISHED.

This vanity belonged to my great grandmother – my father’s grandmother. It’s one of only two furnishings I took from my “old” bedroom. Times have changed and I sit here now on a laptop computer writing a BLOG. There are 3 words in that sentence that didn’t even exist when this was MaMaw’s. I wonder what she would have thought – of me, where I’ve been and where I intend to go. Would sitting down to write and publish your thoughts and actions to the rest of the world have been considered the epitomy of VANITY at that time? Perhaps. Maybe it still is. I do know this though; It’s time to do something for ME. Label it what you will. And put some glitter on that label too. I’m feelin’ kinda sparkly now, so let’s keep it real.

I never put the old mirror that attaches onto MaMaw’s table back at the “old” house. It blocked my window, so I left it off. The symbolism THERE isn’t missed. I had a window to look out and see all that was going on around me yet left off the mirror – the window into my soul. I KNOW!!! I’m pretty freakin’ deep, RIGHT?!? It would’ve been warped anyway. That glass is old and the way I was seeing things was distorted as well. That mirror still sits in my closet back at the house. Look out world! I’m dusting it off and bringing it out. “I’M coming OUT” I hum to myself.

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